Totally Effective Things I Say To My Kid: A List

[brigid]

Here is a list of totally effective things I say to my kid in an attempt to parent and discipline him:

• Hey!
• Stop it!
• Seriously, knock it off.
• Did you hear me?
• What did I just say?
• Why did you do that?
• WHY did you DO that?
• Is that a good idea?
• What do you have?
• OH GOD PUT THAT DOWN.
• I’m going to count to three.
• Is that a good decision?
• I’m going to eat your face.

Mirrored from Now Showing!.

Comments

[waldo]

Here's a list of totally effective things I say to my eleven year old students...


Hey!
Stop it!
Seriously, knock it off.
Did you hear me?
What did I just say?
Why did you do that?
WHY did you DO that?
Is that a good idea?
What do you have?
OH GOD PUT THAT DOWN.
I’m going to count to three.*
Is that a good decision?
Clearly you have no interest in going out for recess today.**


*Okay, full disclosure, usually I count *down* from either five or ten depending on what I need them to do RIGHT THE HELL NOW.

** Threatening to eat their faces would just cause WAY more chaos than I already have.

[msmcknittington]

I am faintly surprised that "Did you just lick that [thing]?" isn't on there. Lucky you if your boy is not a licker of things.