brigid: drawing of two women, one whispering to the other (me)
[personal profile] brigid

Today has been filled with rather more urine than I was expecting.

Apparently I live in a fantasy world where naked toddlers instinctively know how to use a toilet, I don’t even know. Niko is very willing to sit on his little potty, and even stand in front of it and hold his penis… or stand ON IT (it has a lid and makes a little step stool) and stand in front of the toilet while holding his penis, his back slightly arched to point his penis more carefully into the bowl (he has good form). But… nothing happens.

And then he’s running around the kitchen naked and peeing on his feet and saying “oh no!” and running away before I can usher him into the bathroom and the plethora of toilets in there. Yes, perhaps we should move his potty OUT of the bathroom and into the kitchen so it’s more available, but when he has free access to the potty he uses it as a small toy chest. This is behavior I wish to discourage. I’m sure you can imagine why.

The problem with peeing on a tile floor when one is a naked toddler, is that one will then step into the puddle of urine, slip, and fall. Into the urine. Sending it splashing around. This is not comfortable, and it also makes a mess.

Niko very gamely helped me clean up the urine with paper towels, and then I mopped up the floor with a damp rag. And then he peed again. On the floor. “OH NO! PEEPEE!”

Urine, unlike vomit, doesn’t phase me. Heck, I’m not even that wigged out by poop. It’s not the pleasantest thing in the world, but I grew up owning dogs and I spent a summer mucking out horse stalls as part of community service. It’s not that big a deal.

But I still wasn’t prepared for just how much urine there would be.

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